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The Sad, Real-Life Saga of the Boy in a Balloon

October 19th, 2009 Leave a comment Go to comments

As I predicted last week, the balloon boy incident was all a hoax. The authorities in Colorado have issued a statement to that effect and the perpetrators of this appalling travesty are considering hiring “counsel.” Certainly they can’t afford a lawyer adept enough to get them off on an insanity plea so I surmise they will spend time behind bars. Perhaps the brainwashed wife will be spared the harshest of sentences because she is, after all, a total B-movie zombie. A judge might recognize the abject horror of her depraved servitude. We shall see. If I were both judge and jury, which thankfully our legal system does not allow, those two would be spending the remainder of their days doing hard labour in the gulag.

The important question though of what happens to their children remains unanswered. The foster system is a historically rough one and unsuited to the needs of any child, particularly those children who have been unwillingly and unwittingly placed under the microscope of the rapacious American media. Perhaps they will emerge unscathed…but it’s unlikely.

I commend the authorities in Colorado for their refusal to cave, as Wolf Blitzer did, to the manufactured indignation of Mr. Paternis Balloon Boy. Theirs was, in the end, a thorough investigation that yielded the correct conclusions. For that, we owe them our gratitude.

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  1. Brendan
    October 19th, 2009 at 04:10 | #1

    In the words of Grizzly Bear:
    When I clung to you there was nothing to hold on tight with, you left me adrift
    Colorado, what now?

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